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toxic_cornOkay, we all know the drill, now!
Disclaimer and explanation for this story can be found here.
Previous Commentaries: Chapter One Chapter Two
CHAPTER SIX
A picnic? That sounds great, but… Mary Anne, you don't cook. Somehow I
don't think your cop will like a lunch of just sandwiches, Jello Jigglers,
and boxes of Hi-C.
- snippet of an email from Stacey McGill to Mary Anne Spier
Toxic: Hi, we've skipped ahead to Chapter Six, The One Where They Have a
Date Which Doesn't End In Tears. The snippet here was based on one of the
BSC Mysteries, Kristy and the Missing Child. The subplot was all about how
Mary Anne was going to fail Home Ec until she "invented" Jello Jigglers.
Boy did she feel like a dumbass when she discovered the idea for Jigglers is
RIGHT ON THE BOX. Plus there was a big ad campaign. What, does she live
under a rock?
By the time Chad got to the park, Mary Anne was already there waiting for
him. He took a moment to really look at her. She was cute, sitting on the
hood of her little green VW, swinging her legs, picnic blanket in lap. Her
face lit up when she saw him.
T: I gave Mary Anne a VW bug because of a line in the song "Hey
Mister" by Custom, which I was listening to a lot at this time. And I made
the car green because she's innocent. Subtle, huh?
"Hi! Could you carry the cooler? It's a little heavy." She slid off the
hood, making her black and pink checked skirt ride up a little, revealing a
fascinating amount of pale, creamy thigh.
"Sure, I'll be your pack mule." He smiled to let her know he was kidding
and got the cooler out of the back of her car.
They made polite inquiries about each other's day as they walked through the
park, looking for the perfect spot. They found it underneath a tree a
little ways away from where a group of children was playing with a big
chocolate lab.
T: My grandpa always has a Labrador so I grew up around those dogs.
Sweet creatures. I like to try to feature them in stories I write.
After spreading the blanket on the ground, they settled down and Mary Anne
started to pull their lunch out of the cooler. Chad watched, bemused, as
every bit of food revealed was still in the deli containers from the grocery
store.
"My, my, my," he said, raising his eyebrows. "You must be a culinary
magician to make all this food, and get these plastic containers to put them
in. And where'd you get the grocery store labels? Nice touch."
N: Haha, he's such an ass.
She laughed, embarrassed. "I hope this is okay. I've never been much of a
cook; I barely passed home ec. If it weren't for Jello Jigglers, I would've
flunked."
He winked at her. "I'm not much of one, either. But my excuse is that in
my day, boys didn't have to take home ec." He realized he was dating
himself and mentally facepalmed.
T: And they had to walk in the snow barefoot to get to school. Uphill!
Both ways!
N: They ate nothing but bread sandwiches for breakfast, lunch, and
dinner!
"Well, not much has changed, really," Mary Anne said, gently. "They still
opt for woodshop, except the ones who realize it's a good idea to get into a
roomful of girls."
"I probably would have gone for home ec then," Chad said, laughing. "My
friends would have made fun of me, but I'd get to hang out with girls for an
hour, so it'd all work out."
T: Chad Shelten: Teenage Pimp.
"I don't know, I think you would've regretted it when you got to the egg
baby unit. That was a nightmare right there." At that moment, she handed
him a tray of deviled eggs and blushed at the awkward timing.
Amused, he took the tray from her. "I hope no one died to make these eggs."
He opened the plastic lid and popped one of the things into his mouth.
"It was a noble sacrifice," he said with a playful wink.
As he was going for another one, he took a bite out of it and the damn thing
fell apart, spilling onto his polo shirt.
N: Geez, Shelten, if you'd taken home ec, you would have been taught the
proper way to eat a deviled egg!
"Oh!" Mary Anne grabbed one of the napkins. "Here, let me…" She started
dabbing at his shirt, practically in his lap. It was nice having her so
close; she smelled fantastic.
Mary Anne glanced up at his face and saw the way he was looking at her.
"Sorry, you're capable of doing this… I'll just…" She started to scramble
away and he couldn't have that.
"I dunno, you were doing a pretty good job there." He inspected his shirt.
"Missed a spot. You wanna come back and get this?"
She inched close to him, peering at his shirt. "Where?"
Once she was close enough, Chad ducked his head and sneaked in a soft kiss.
Mary Anne's eyes widened and she pulled away, startled.
Chad grinned at her slyly. "Wow, I can't believe you fell for the 'you
missed a spot' line." His grin faded into a look of concern when she still
looked startled. "What's the matter? I'm not that bad a kisser, am
I?"
She shook her head, slowly. "Sorry, you're only the second person I've ever
kissed, so…" Her face flushed pink as she ducked her head.
"Oh." God damn Huckleberry Hound… "Well, hopefully it met your
approval. I'm no eighteen year old delinquent but I'm pretty sure I know
how to kiss."
"I didn't say you didn't!" Mary Anne exclaimed, dismayed. "You're a nice
kisser, it's just that I have to get used to… you know. Someone… else."
She bit her lip before inching her head closer to him. "So… let me get used
to you."
"Now that's a sound argument if I ever heard one," Chad said, meeting her
halfway.
The kiss was sweet and gentle at first with nice, teasing little nibbles
here and there. But then Mary Anne made a soft, whimpering sound and
started pressing her mouth against his a little harder, getting more and
more intense by the second. Her hands fisted in his shirt front and it took
every ounce of control Chad had not to lower her down on the blanket and…
When she bit his lower lip and gave it a tug, he knew he had to calm her
down.
T: I remember I wanted one of them to lose control and Nutmeg stubbornly
refused to make it Chad. So it's Mary Anne who gets fresh. Who knew?
N: Chad only loses control when he's beating the hell out of his former
partner. Trufax.
"Whoa, still in public, Mary Anne. Tone it down a bit."
She jumped off him like she'd been burnt, panting, eyes dilated. "Oh my
god, I am so sorry." Her eyes started to tear up in embarrassment.
Chad went into comfort mode, reaching a hand out to touch her shoulder.
"Hey, it's okay. I'm definitely not complaining about your eagerness… just
the location. You know, kids and their dogs playing Frisbee and all that."
"I know, it's just… it's been so long and you're such a good kisser
that I just…" She started to crumble but pulled herself together. "Sorry.
That won't happen again."
"Been so long?" Chad repeated, incredulously. "Huckleberry Hound wasn't
kissing you, huh? Now that's a crime." He grinned boyishly.
"Besides, I hope it does happen again."
She blushed and smiled at him sweetly. "Just in a more private location,
right?"
"Exactly."
Mary Anne stared at his mouth for a moment but then tore her eyes away.
"So, um, did you want something to drink? I've got… uh…" She started to
fumble with the cooler.
Chad perked up. "Cherry Coke?"
Sure enough, she pulled out a can. "Of course." She handed it to him,
giggling at his eagerness.
"I like a woman who anticipates my needs," he joked, popping open the tab.
She blushed. "I just remembered… at the station… when you…"
"I'm not making you nervous again, am I?"
"Oh! No, I'm just trying to calm down. All I can think about is jumping
you again." She looked horrified to have said it out loud, but it was too
late to take it back.
N: Mary Anne Spier: Secretly a sex fiend.
Flattered, Chad chuckled. "Seriously? Should I act less appealing or
something? Get you to calm down before you pounce again?"
T: "I can start picking my nose if you like. Or… okay, I know. Pull
my finger!"
His humor worked to relax her. "Oh yes, men like you need to be protected
from vicious little girls like me."
"I'll be on my guard then."
Mary Anne giggled but then froze.
"What? Is a vicious girl sneaking up behind me?" he asked, jokingly. He
contemplated her expression a moment. "I didn't mean I'd be on my guard
with you if that's what--" He stopped when he realized she wasn't
listening to him. "What's wrong?"
"Do you hear that?" She leapt to her feet, on alert.
"Hear what?" Chad asked, confused.
"Someone's in trouble." And with that, she dashed off to the rescue.
N: She's got the hearing of a St. Bernard.
"Wait, Mary Anne!" Chad got up to follow. "We can't just leave all the
picnic stuff behind." He grumbled a little, irritated. "What are you
doing?!"
"My job!" she called over her shoulder, not stopping as she ran.
"Your j-! Mary Anne!" He whined a bit as he followed in her wake. The
way she was acting, you'd think she'd have a cape flapping behind her, maybe
some theme music blaring.
T: The super hero joke was Nutmeg's. She liked it so much that she
used it again in Stacey Loves the Invisible Man.
N: Haha, and I only just now realized that! Recycled jokes FTW!
\0/
They stopped when they found a little boy crouched under a tree, crying.
Mary Anne crossed to him, kneeling down to his level.
"Hi," she said softly. "What's the matter?"
The little boy raised his sad, watery gaze up to Mary Anne's face. "I lost
my momma!" Now that he had an audience, the little boy's crying ratcheted
up a few notches, making the hairs on the back of Chad's neck raise.
"Oh, sweet Jesus," he muttered, rolling his eyes.
Mary Anne ignored him. "My name's Mary Anne. What's yours?"
The little boy sniffled. "Brian."
"Well, Brian, I'm going to help you find your momma. And the man I'm with
is a police officer and he's going to help you, too." She gave Chad a
look. "Right, Chad ?"
He raised an eyebrow but looked at the kid and gave in. "Sure am." He
crouched down next to Mary Anne so he was also at the kid's eye level.
"Now, do you remember what you and your mom were doing here at the park?"
He looked to Mary Anne to make sure he was doing okay and grinned at her
proud expression.
T: Boy, I constantly got lost when I was little. Never was I saved by
dual prettiness comparable to Chary Anne, though.
"I was playin' on the toys but then I went potty and I came out and…"
Brian's lip wobbled. "I don't know where the toys are!"
T: I based the concept of a bathroom with a front and back entrance from
rest stops I've been to. I'm sure lots of kids have gotten lost this way,
since its discombobulated me as an adult.
"I know where the toys are, Brian," Mary Anne said quickly. "We'll take you
there and find your momma, okay?" She turned to Chad. "The bathrooms here
have both a front and back entrance; it's easy for a little kid to get
confused."
Chad nodded, not really caring. "Right. Okay, let's go."
The three rose to their feet. Brian looked up at Chad, cautiously. "Are
you really a p'liceman?"
Chad pulled his badge from his pocket. "Yeah, see my badge here?" He
showed it to the boy and winced when he tried to get his grubby fingers on
it. Not wanting the kid to go into hysterics again, he let him take it.
"You can hold onto that for me until we get back to your mom, okay? Don't
drop it now, I'm counting on you to keep it safe."
Brian nodded gravely. "Okay." Then his face lit up. "Can I shoot your gun?"
Chad's expression darkened. "No. Now don't you want to find your mom?"
The boy pouted. "Yes."
"Ok, then, let's hop to it." He started to lead the way along the path,
Mary Anne and Brian just a few paces behind him, hand in hand. Then he
thought it would be a better idea to let them lead, so he could keep an eye
on them, so he stopped and let them walk around him.
Only, Brian wasn't walking. He was hopping.
T: There was a similar joke in the movie Uncle Buck, where John Candy
tells the kids to hop into the car and they literally do it.
Chad rolled his eyes but couldn't help but chuckle.
Mary Anne gave him a mischievous look and started hopping too.
T: Adults who humor kids are really cool. Like when my idiotic cousin insisted we had to skip into Skippers or we'd get thrown out.
"If you think I'm going to start hopping, you have another thing coming,"
Chad said, dryly.
Mary Anne laughed hysterically, swinging her and Brian's joined hands. The
little boy started giggling as well, trying to keep his hops in unison with
hers.
Chad looked on, thoughtfully. She just might be the woman for me…
If she could get over the worst of her shyness, at least.
"Brian!" A panicked looking woman ahead of them waved her arms.
"Momma!" Brian dropped Mary Anne's hand and ran lickety split to the woman,
who swept him up in her arms, dropping kisses all over his face as she wept.
"Don't ever wander away like that again, do you hear me?" the woman
exclaimed.
Brian submitted to her kisses with the air of someone long used to putting
up with that sort of thing. "Mary Anne and P'liceman Chad saved-ed me!"
T: Nutmeg had jokingly started using double ed-ed's in conversation so I
yoinked that from her for Brian's dialogue.
N: My favorite one to use is to say that I are confused-ed.
The mother hugged Brian tightly and gave them a grateful look. "Oh, thank
you so much! I don't know what would've happened if you hadn't found him."
"No problem." Chad put his arm around Mary Anne. "It was my date who found
him." He nodded at Brian. "By the way, I'm gonna need my badge back now,
buddy. Good job holding onto it for me." He did the 'hand it over' wave.
Brian handed it back reluctantly, not wanting to let the bit of shiny go.
N: Chad's gonna hose it down with Lysol once he gets home. Little kids
are filthy, ya know.
"Well, thank you Mary Anne," Brian's mother said. "We're new to the area so
I can see how Brian could've gotten lost. I tend to do it myself." She
laughed in self deprecation. "I'm still trying to find daycare for Brian…"
"Oh! I work at a daycare!" Like a pro, she pulled out a card and handed it
to the woman. Did she carry those everywhere for just such an occasion?
"It's a nice place and I think Brian would be happy there."
T: Kristy would be so proud if she saw this…
The mother accepted the card and set Brian on the ground. "Thanks, I'll
look into it. Say thank you to the nice people, Brian."
"Thank you," he said obediently, then reached out to Mary Anne. "I gots a
secret!"
"What?" Mary Anne knelt down in front of him.
In a loud stage whisper everyone could hear, Brian said, "You're pretty."
Chad watched in amusement as Mary Anne blushed. Not much of a secret,
really, when Mary Anne being pretty was common knowledge.
N: Damn straight! Tox and I have girl crushes on Summer Glau. She
shouldn't be allowed to be that pretty; it makes the rest of us look bad.
Tsk tsk!
"Thanks again," the mother said, sounding amused. "See you around!" She
led Brian away as the little tyke started chattering all about his
adventure.
"Well, I'm impressed," Chad said as Mary Anne rose to her feet. "You
handled that like a pro. You'll make a great teacher."
"I've been babysitting since I was twelve," she said. "I was in a club and
everything."
He chuckled. "A club? Wow, was it no boys allowed?" He slipped his arm
around her shoulders and led her back to where their picnic (hopefully)
still was.
"No, Logan was in it as an associate member." She winced at the mention of
her ex and added lamely, "We were equal opportunity."
"I see," Chad said, keeping his inner grumbling silent. "Let's see if
anyone took off with our meal."
"I hope not. That little adventure's made me-" Her belly gurgled.
"Hungry."
Laughing, they were happy to see that everything was just as they'd left it.
"Hey, whaddya know, it's a miracle." Chad sat back down and tugged her down
beside him. "Were we at dessert yet?"
She gave him a teasing smile. "I thought you wanted to save that for a
private location?"
Impressed, Chad realized that their adventure had done more than make her
hungry. It seemed like now she was more confident and in her element. "I
guess I was talking about the wrong kind of dessert. What location did you
have in mind?"
Mary Anne shrugged. "Well, if you wanted normal dessert, I packed
pie…" She rummaged in the cooler.
Chad perked up. "Cherry pie?"
T: I kind of wonder what he would've done had the pie been apple or
pumpkin.
N: Throw a fit, call her a whore, and kick a tree.
She pulled out the cherry pie, giggling uncontrollably. "Anticipated your
needs again!"
"Wow, you sure did." He cut himself a large piece and she scooped some Cool
Whip on top. Then he happily tucked in, no doubt making a pig of himself.
"You're so charming," she teased but her smile was sincere.
"I do like to make a good impression on people," Chad said, not knowing he
had a bit of cherry filling on the corner of his mouth.
Mary Anne's eyes darkened and she leaned forward, licking the filling away.
"Well, you're successful."
Chad grabbed her chin as she was pulling away. "I am. I wear a suit and
everything."
This time, when he pulled her in for a kiss, they were both able to keep
themselves under control. Mary Anne was the first to pull away,
reluctantly.
"It's getting late," she said, her tone heavy with regret.
"Ah, of course. The 'lick me and leave me' routine." He pouted a little.
T: There's an actual routine? How often has he fallen for this? That's terribly sad.
She pouted back. "I'm sorry. Jan asked me to come over today; there's been
an issue at the daycare I need to help her out with."
"Okay, I guess if it's for work then I understand. I can be a workaholic
myself."
She frowned. "You can?"
"Well, yeah, sometimes. I mean, not all the time, but if there's a big
issue in IA, I'm the one who's got to take care of it and that means staying
late… I don't mean that I do that a lot but sometimes things come
up."
T: "I'm not a workaholic even though I totally am! Please love
me!"
Mary Anne gave him a comforting smile. "I understand. Help me pack this
stuff up?"
"Sure. It's the least I could do after all the hard work you did to cook- I
mean buy it." He grinned, devilishly, and was pleased when she
laughed and slapped his arm.
T: He... really needs to get over the fact that she doesn't cook.
They walked back to their cars in silence, her arm looped through his. It
was a nice, comfortable silence and neither really felt the need to fill it.
He put the cooler in her backseat for her and then they stared at each
other a long moment.
N: And in the background, the first strains of Unchained Melody fill the
air...
T: Actually, I was hearing "The Rose" in my own head. "Some say looooooooooooooove it iiiiiiiiiiiiiiis a riiiiiiiiiiveeeeeeeeer..."
"Thank you for coming out with me today, Chad," she said, softly.
"Are you kidding? Thank you for asking me; I thought I'd blown it with
you."
She smiled and shook her head.
"So," Chad said. "When can I see you again?"
Mary Anne frowned in thought. "I'm not sure. I have some quizzes and
papers coming up that I'm going to have to work on, and Jan's planning a new
schedule for us that won't be ready until the end of the week." She peeked
up at him through her eyelashes. "Maybe… can you call me then and ask?"
"Sure." He smiled back at her.
"I'll just give you my cellphone number…" she opened the backdoor and
rummaged in a cardboard box full of puzzles and stickers and other kids
things until she found a magic marker. "Give me your hand…"
T: And that cardboard box full of goodies is another Kristy Thomas
invention: The Kid Kit.
N: Of course, as an 18 year old female working in daycare, she can get
away with having that in her car. If druggie Logan had a Kid Kit in his
car, he'd be called a Child Predator.
She wrote her number on his palm neatly and capped the pen. "There you go."
"All right. Thanks. So I'll call you soon." He dipped his head down and
gave her a soft goodbye kiss.
"Okay," she whispered. He held her car door open for her and shut it when
she was safely inside.
He stood and watched her pull out of the parking lot and waved back when she
wiggled her fingers at him. He didn't climb into his own car until hers
had faded into the distance.
~*~
Several hours later, Mary Anne got home from work, exhausted from having to
assemble crib after crib after crib. It didn't help that the instructions
had started in English, changed to French, and then concluded in Spanish.
An envelope with her name written on it was taped to her front door. It was
in Logan's handwriting.
What could he possibly have to say? A better question: Did she care? She
pulled it off and stared at it a moment.
No, she didn't. She ripped it up and let the pieces scatter in the wind,
hoping Dawn wouldn't find one of them in the parking lot and start
complaining about people not caring for the earth.
T: I opened one of the later chapters with what was written in that
destroyed letter, so its contents didn't stay a mystery.
Disclaimer and explanation for this story can be found here.
Previous Commentaries: Chapter One Chapter Two
A picnic? That sounds great, but… Mary Anne, you don't cook. Somehow I
don't think your cop will like a lunch of just sandwiches, Jello Jigglers,
and boxes of Hi-C.
- snippet of an email from Stacey McGill to Mary Anne Spier
Toxic: Hi, we've skipped ahead to Chapter Six, The One Where They Have a
Date Which Doesn't End In Tears. The snippet here was based on one of the
BSC Mysteries, Kristy and the Missing Child. The subplot was all about how
Mary Anne was going to fail Home Ec until she "invented" Jello Jigglers.
Boy did she feel like a dumbass when she discovered the idea for Jigglers is
RIGHT ON THE BOX. Plus there was a big ad campaign. What, does she live
under a rock?
By the time Chad got to the park, Mary Anne was already there waiting for
him. He took a moment to really look at her. She was cute, sitting on the
hood of her little green VW, swinging her legs, picnic blanket in lap. Her
face lit up when she saw him.
T: I gave Mary Anne a VW bug because of a line in the song "Hey
Mister" by Custom, which I was listening to a lot at this time. And I made
the car green because she's innocent. Subtle, huh?
"Hi! Could you carry the cooler? It's a little heavy." She slid off the
hood, making her black and pink checked skirt ride up a little, revealing a
fascinating amount of pale, creamy thigh.
"Sure, I'll be your pack mule." He smiled to let her know he was kidding
and got the cooler out of the back of her car.
They made polite inquiries about each other's day as they walked through the
park, looking for the perfect spot. They found it underneath a tree a
little ways away from where a group of children was playing with a big
chocolate lab.
T: My grandpa always has a Labrador so I grew up around those dogs.
Sweet creatures. I like to try to feature them in stories I write.
After spreading the blanket on the ground, they settled down and Mary Anne
started to pull their lunch out of the cooler. Chad watched, bemused, as
every bit of food revealed was still in the deli containers from the grocery
store.
"My, my, my," he said, raising his eyebrows. "You must be a culinary
magician to make all this food, and get these plastic containers to put them
in. And where'd you get the grocery store labels? Nice touch."
N: Haha, he's such an ass.
She laughed, embarrassed. "I hope this is okay. I've never been much of a
cook; I barely passed home ec. If it weren't for Jello Jigglers, I would've
flunked."
He winked at her. "I'm not much of one, either. But my excuse is that in
my day, boys didn't have to take home ec." He realized he was dating
himself and mentally facepalmed.
T: And they had to walk in the snow barefoot to get to school. Uphill!
Both ways!
N: They ate nothing but bread sandwiches for breakfast, lunch, and
dinner!
"Well, not much has changed, really," Mary Anne said, gently. "They still
opt for woodshop, except the ones who realize it's a good idea to get into a
roomful of girls."
"I probably would have gone for home ec then," Chad said, laughing. "My
friends would have made fun of me, but I'd get to hang out with girls for an
hour, so it'd all work out."
T: Chad Shelten: Teenage Pimp.
"I don't know, I think you would've regretted it when you got to the egg
baby unit. That was a nightmare right there." At that moment, she handed
him a tray of deviled eggs and blushed at the awkward timing.
Amused, he took the tray from her. "I hope no one died to make these eggs."
He opened the plastic lid and popped one of the things into his mouth.
"It was a noble sacrifice," he said with a playful wink.
As he was going for another one, he took a bite out of it and the damn thing
fell apart, spilling onto his polo shirt.
N: Geez, Shelten, if you'd taken home ec, you would have been taught the
proper way to eat a deviled egg!
"Oh!" Mary Anne grabbed one of the napkins. "Here, let me…" She started
dabbing at his shirt, practically in his lap. It was nice having her so
close; she smelled fantastic.
Mary Anne glanced up at his face and saw the way he was looking at her.
"Sorry, you're capable of doing this… I'll just…" She started to scramble
away and he couldn't have that.
"I dunno, you were doing a pretty good job there." He inspected his shirt.
"Missed a spot. You wanna come back and get this?"
She inched close to him, peering at his shirt. "Where?"
Once she was close enough, Chad ducked his head and sneaked in a soft kiss.
Mary Anne's eyes widened and she pulled away, startled.
Chad grinned at her slyly. "Wow, I can't believe you fell for the 'you
missed a spot' line." His grin faded into a look of concern when she still
looked startled. "What's the matter? I'm not that bad a kisser, am
I?"
She shook her head, slowly. "Sorry, you're only the second person I've ever
kissed, so…" Her face flushed pink as she ducked her head.
"Oh." God damn Huckleberry Hound… "Well, hopefully it met your
approval. I'm no eighteen year old delinquent but I'm pretty sure I know
how to kiss."
"I didn't say you didn't!" Mary Anne exclaimed, dismayed. "You're a nice
kisser, it's just that I have to get used to… you know. Someone… else."
She bit her lip before inching her head closer to him. "So… let me get used
to you."
"Now that's a sound argument if I ever heard one," Chad said, meeting her
halfway.
The kiss was sweet and gentle at first with nice, teasing little nibbles
here and there. But then Mary Anne made a soft, whimpering sound and
started pressing her mouth against his a little harder, getting more and
more intense by the second. Her hands fisted in his shirt front and it took
every ounce of control Chad had not to lower her down on the blanket and…
When she bit his lower lip and gave it a tug, he knew he had to calm her
down.
T: I remember I wanted one of them to lose control and Nutmeg stubbornly
refused to make it Chad. So it's Mary Anne who gets fresh. Who knew?
N: Chad only loses control when he's beating the hell out of his former
partner. Trufax.
"Whoa, still in public, Mary Anne. Tone it down a bit."
She jumped off him like she'd been burnt, panting, eyes dilated. "Oh my
god, I am so sorry." Her eyes started to tear up in embarrassment.
Chad went into comfort mode, reaching a hand out to touch her shoulder.
"Hey, it's okay. I'm definitely not complaining about your eagerness… just
the location. You know, kids and their dogs playing Frisbee and all that."
"I know, it's just… it's been so long and you're such a good kisser
that I just…" She started to crumble but pulled herself together. "Sorry.
That won't happen again."
"Been so long?" Chad repeated, incredulously. "Huckleberry Hound wasn't
kissing you, huh? Now that's a crime." He grinned boyishly.
"Besides, I hope it does happen again."
She blushed and smiled at him sweetly. "Just in a more private location,
right?"
"Exactly."
Mary Anne stared at his mouth for a moment but then tore her eyes away.
"So, um, did you want something to drink? I've got… uh…" She started to
fumble with the cooler.
Chad perked up. "Cherry Coke?"
Sure enough, she pulled out a can. "Of course." She handed it to him,
giggling at his eagerness.
"I like a woman who anticipates my needs," he joked, popping open the tab.
She blushed. "I just remembered… at the station… when you…"
"I'm not making you nervous again, am I?"
"Oh! No, I'm just trying to calm down. All I can think about is jumping
you again." She looked horrified to have said it out loud, but it was too
late to take it back.
N: Mary Anne Spier: Secretly a sex fiend.
Flattered, Chad chuckled. "Seriously? Should I act less appealing or
something? Get you to calm down before you pounce again?"
T: "I can start picking my nose if you like. Or… okay, I know. Pull
my finger!"
His humor worked to relax her. "Oh yes, men like you need to be protected
from vicious little girls like me."
"I'll be on my guard then."
Mary Anne giggled but then froze.
"What? Is a vicious girl sneaking up behind me?" he asked, jokingly. He
contemplated her expression a moment. "I didn't mean I'd be on my guard
with you if that's what--" He stopped when he realized she wasn't
listening to him. "What's wrong?"
"Do you hear that?" She leapt to her feet, on alert.
"Hear what?" Chad asked, confused.
"Someone's in trouble." And with that, she dashed off to the rescue.
N: She's got the hearing of a St. Bernard.
"Wait, Mary Anne!" Chad got up to follow. "We can't just leave all the
picnic stuff behind." He grumbled a little, irritated. "What are you
doing?!"
"My job!" she called over her shoulder, not stopping as she ran.
"Your j-! Mary Anne!" He whined a bit as he followed in her wake. The
way she was acting, you'd think she'd have a cape flapping behind her, maybe
some theme music blaring.
T: The super hero joke was Nutmeg's. She liked it so much that she
used it again in Stacey Loves the Invisible Man.
N: Haha, and I only just now realized that! Recycled jokes FTW!
\0/
They stopped when they found a little boy crouched under a tree, crying.
Mary Anne crossed to him, kneeling down to his level.
"Hi," she said softly. "What's the matter?"
The little boy raised his sad, watery gaze up to Mary Anne's face. "I lost
my momma!" Now that he had an audience, the little boy's crying ratcheted
up a few notches, making the hairs on the back of Chad's neck raise.
"Oh, sweet Jesus," he muttered, rolling his eyes.
Mary Anne ignored him. "My name's Mary Anne. What's yours?"
The little boy sniffled. "Brian."
"Well, Brian, I'm going to help you find your momma. And the man I'm with
is a police officer and he's going to help you, too." She gave Chad a
look. "Right, Chad ?"
He raised an eyebrow but looked at the kid and gave in. "Sure am." He
crouched down next to Mary Anne so he was also at the kid's eye level.
"Now, do you remember what you and your mom were doing here at the park?"
He looked to Mary Anne to make sure he was doing okay and grinned at her
proud expression.
T: Boy, I constantly got lost when I was little. Never was I saved by
dual prettiness comparable to Chary Anne, though.
"I was playin' on the toys but then I went potty and I came out and…"
Brian's lip wobbled. "I don't know where the toys are!"
T: I based the concept of a bathroom with a front and back entrance from
rest stops I've been to. I'm sure lots of kids have gotten lost this way,
since its discombobulated me as an adult.
"I know where the toys are, Brian," Mary Anne said quickly. "We'll take you
there and find your momma, okay?" She turned to Chad. "The bathrooms here
have both a front and back entrance; it's easy for a little kid to get
confused."
Chad nodded, not really caring. "Right. Okay, let's go."
The three rose to their feet. Brian looked up at Chad, cautiously. "Are
you really a p'liceman?"
Chad pulled his badge from his pocket. "Yeah, see my badge here?" He
showed it to the boy and winced when he tried to get his grubby fingers on
it. Not wanting the kid to go into hysterics again, he let him take it.
"You can hold onto that for me until we get back to your mom, okay? Don't
drop it now, I'm counting on you to keep it safe."
Brian nodded gravely. "Okay." Then his face lit up. "Can I shoot your gun?"
Chad's expression darkened. "No. Now don't you want to find your mom?"
The boy pouted. "Yes."
"Ok, then, let's hop to it." He started to lead the way along the path,
Mary Anne and Brian just a few paces behind him, hand in hand. Then he
thought it would be a better idea to let them lead, so he could keep an eye
on them, so he stopped and let them walk around him.
Only, Brian wasn't walking. He was hopping.
T: There was a similar joke in the movie Uncle Buck, where John Candy
tells the kids to hop into the car and they literally do it.
Chad rolled his eyes but couldn't help but chuckle.
Mary Anne gave him a mischievous look and started hopping too.
T: Adults who humor kids are really cool. Like when my idiotic cousin insisted we had to skip into Skippers or we'd get thrown out.
"If you think I'm going to start hopping, you have another thing coming,"
Chad said, dryly.
Mary Anne laughed hysterically, swinging her and Brian's joined hands. The
little boy started giggling as well, trying to keep his hops in unison with
hers.
Chad looked on, thoughtfully. She just might be the woman for me…
If she could get over the worst of her shyness, at least.
"Brian!" A panicked looking woman ahead of them waved her arms.
"Momma!" Brian dropped Mary Anne's hand and ran lickety split to the woman,
who swept him up in her arms, dropping kisses all over his face as she wept.
"Don't ever wander away like that again, do you hear me?" the woman
exclaimed.
Brian submitted to her kisses with the air of someone long used to putting
up with that sort of thing. "Mary Anne and P'liceman Chad saved-ed me!"
T: Nutmeg had jokingly started using double ed-ed's in conversation so I
yoinked that from her for Brian's dialogue.
N: My favorite one to use is to say that I are confused-ed.
The mother hugged Brian tightly and gave them a grateful look. "Oh, thank
you so much! I don't know what would've happened if you hadn't found him."
"No problem." Chad put his arm around Mary Anne. "It was my date who found
him." He nodded at Brian. "By the way, I'm gonna need my badge back now,
buddy. Good job holding onto it for me." He did the 'hand it over' wave.
Brian handed it back reluctantly, not wanting to let the bit of shiny go.
N: Chad's gonna hose it down with Lysol once he gets home. Little kids
are filthy, ya know.
"Well, thank you Mary Anne," Brian's mother said. "We're new to the area so
I can see how Brian could've gotten lost. I tend to do it myself." She
laughed in self deprecation. "I'm still trying to find daycare for Brian…"
"Oh! I work at a daycare!" Like a pro, she pulled out a card and handed it
to the woman. Did she carry those everywhere for just such an occasion?
"It's a nice place and I think Brian would be happy there."
T: Kristy would be so proud if she saw this…
The mother accepted the card and set Brian on the ground. "Thanks, I'll
look into it. Say thank you to the nice people, Brian."
"Thank you," he said obediently, then reached out to Mary Anne. "I gots a
secret!"
"What?" Mary Anne knelt down in front of him.
In a loud stage whisper everyone could hear, Brian said, "You're pretty."
Chad watched in amusement as Mary Anne blushed. Not much of a secret,
really, when Mary Anne being pretty was common knowledge.
N: Damn straight! Tox and I have girl crushes on Summer Glau. She
shouldn't be allowed to be that pretty; it makes the rest of us look bad.
Tsk tsk!
"Thanks again," the mother said, sounding amused. "See you around!" She
led Brian away as the little tyke started chattering all about his
adventure.
"Well, I'm impressed," Chad said as Mary Anne rose to her feet. "You
handled that like a pro. You'll make a great teacher."
"I've been babysitting since I was twelve," she said. "I was in a club and
everything."
He chuckled. "A club? Wow, was it no boys allowed?" He slipped his arm
around her shoulders and led her back to where their picnic (hopefully)
still was.
"No, Logan was in it as an associate member." She winced at the mention of
her ex and added lamely, "We were equal opportunity."
"I see," Chad said, keeping his inner grumbling silent. "Let's see if
anyone took off with our meal."
"I hope not. That little adventure's made me-" Her belly gurgled.
"Hungry."
Laughing, they were happy to see that everything was just as they'd left it.
"Hey, whaddya know, it's a miracle." Chad sat back down and tugged her down
beside him. "Were we at dessert yet?"
She gave him a teasing smile. "I thought you wanted to save that for a
private location?"
Impressed, Chad realized that their adventure had done more than make her
hungry. It seemed like now she was more confident and in her element. "I
guess I was talking about the wrong kind of dessert. What location did you
have in mind?"
Mary Anne shrugged. "Well, if you wanted normal dessert, I packed
pie…" She rummaged in the cooler.
Chad perked up. "Cherry pie?"
T: I kind of wonder what he would've done had the pie been apple or
pumpkin.
N: Throw a fit, call her a whore, and kick a tree.
She pulled out the cherry pie, giggling uncontrollably. "Anticipated your
needs again!"
"Wow, you sure did." He cut himself a large piece and she scooped some Cool
Whip on top. Then he happily tucked in, no doubt making a pig of himself.
"You're so charming," she teased but her smile was sincere.
"I do like to make a good impression on people," Chad said, not knowing he
had a bit of cherry filling on the corner of his mouth.
Mary Anne's eyes darkened and she leaned forward, licking the filling away.
"Well, you're successful."
Chad grabbed her chin as she was pulling away. "I am. I wear a suit and
everything."
This time, when he pulled her in for a kiss, they were both able to keep
themselves under control. Mary Anne was the first to pull away,
reluctantly.
"It's getting late," she said, her tone heavy with regret.
"Ah, of course. The 'lick me and leave me' routine." He pouted a little.
T: There's an actual routine? How often has he fallen for this? That's terribly sad.
She pouted back. "I'm sorry. Jan asked me to come over today; there's been
an issue at the daycare I need to help her out with."
"Okay, I guess if it's for work then I understand. I can be a workaholic
myself."
She frowned. "You can?"
"Well, yeah, sometimes. I mean, not all the time, but if there's a big
issue in IA, I'm the one who's got to take care of it and that means staying
late… I don't mean that I do that a lot but sometimes things come
up."
T: "I'm not a workaholic even though I totally am! Please love
me!"
Mary Anne gave him a comforting smile. "I understand. Help me pack this
stuff up?"
"Sure. It's the least I could do after all the hard work you did to cook- I
mean buy it." He grinned, devilishly, and was pleased when she
laughed and slapped his arm.
T: He... really needs to get over the fact that she doesn't cook.
They walked back to their cars in silence, her arm looped through his. It
was a nice, comfortable silence and neither really felt the need to fill it.
He put the cooler in her backseat for her and then they stared at each
other a long moment.
N: And in the background, the first strains of Unchained Melody fill the
air...
T: Actually, I was hearing "The Rose" in my own head. "Some say looooooooooooooove it iiiiiiiiiiiiiiis a riiiiiiiiiiveeeeeeeeer..."
"Thank you for coming out with me today, Chad," she said, softly.
"Are you kidding? Thank you for asking me; I thought I'd blown it with
you."
She smiled and shook her head.
"So," Chad said. "When can I see you again?"
Mary Anne frowned in thought. "I'm not sure. I have some quizzes and
papers coming up that I'm going to have to work on, and Jan's planning a new
schedule for us that won't be ready until the end of the week." She peeked
up at him through her eyelashes. "Maybe… can you call me then and ask?"
"Sure." He smiled back at her.
"I'll just give you my cellphone number…" she opened the backdoor and
rummaged in a cardboard box full of puzzles and stickers and other kids
things until she found a magic marker. "Give me your hand…"
T: And that cardboard box full of goodies is another Kristy Thomas
invention: The Kid Kit.
N: Of course, as an 18 year old female working in daycare, she can get
away with having that in her car. If druggie Logan had a Kid Kit in his
car, he'd be called a Child Predator.
She wrote her number on his palm neatly and capped the pen. "There you go."
"All right. Thanks. So I'll call you soon." He dipped his head down and
gave her a soft goodbye kiss.
"Okay," she whispered. He held her car door open for her and shut it when
she was safely inside.
He stood and watched her pull out of the parking lot and waved back when she
wiggled her fingers at him. He didn't climb into his own car until hers
had faded into the distance.
Several hours later, Mary Anne got home from work, exhausted from having to
assemble crib after crib after crib. It didn't help that the instructions
had started in English, changed to French, and then concluded in Spanish.
An envelope with her name written on it was taped to her front door. It was
in Logan's handwriting.
What could he possibly have to say? A better question: Did she care? She
pulled it off and stared at it a moment.
No, she didn't. She ripped it up and let the pieces scatter in the wind,
hoping Dawn wouldn't find one of them in the parking lot and start
complaining about people not caring for the earth.
T: I opened one of the later chapters with what was written in that
destroyed letter, so its contents didn't stay a mystery.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2007-09-07 11:22 pm (UTC)I have a nagging feeling that Rita might have been behind this one, Tox. LOL!
I loves the commentary, precious :)
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Date: 2007-09-08 04:50 am (UTC)Two more chapters to go! \0/
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Date: 2007-09-09 09:00 am (UTC)*comments*
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Date: 2007-09-09 08:46 pm (UTC)*replies*
:P
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Date: 2007-09-10 10:57 pm (UTC)Amused me to no end.
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Date: 2007-09-11 04:42 am (UTC)